I am so often so far from who I wish to be

Only showing the world the facade I wish them to see

Hiding inside the man a frightened child silently weeps

Retreating, concealing, hiding the dark secrets inside I keep

Longing to reveal my self in truth, power and authenticity

The glory of my design by a creator who loves unconditionally

Doubting my worth, my purpose, my destiny is tragic

For beyond the ages I was set apart by a deeper magic

Loved from the beginning in the time before time

Forgiven for each every committed future crime

Redeemed and saved I should bask in His grace

Why then, oh why do I struggle to take my rightful place

Dark forces of evil whisper of my failures that own me

Laughing, intimidating lies mask the truth of who I can be

Love is softly spoken in the few quiet still moments of rest

Why can’t I let go and accept His best

Gifts freely given like grace and mercy is bestowed each day

To live through Him and grow stronger in His embrace I’ll stay

To lose myself surrendering all my selfish needs

Realizing finally He is the gardener and I only the seed

 ~Mark Schutter ©2013

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  1. Oh my goodness..this describes me too..Excellent! If we would just stop the hiding and take off the masks.. He is the potter and we the clay and be at peace knowing that He is still perfecting…

  2. He the Refiner’s Fire and I his mortal clay. 😉 … Lovely poem with universal truth that few will ever acknowledge. I know this speaks to my truth. Thank you for sharing, Mark. … Be well, Dorothy 🙂

    1. Thank you Dorothy! Your comment is so true. As I already commented just writing and sharing the truth about my own insecurities and trying to turn to Him to find my worth. Shining a light into the dark and who knows maybe it will touch someone else! 🙂

  3. “Realizing finally He is the gardener and I only the seed” The realization that we are only the seed is a difficult one. I often cannot see the beauty that will become from all I go through, but like the gardener knows what the seed will look like, our Creator knows our beautiful outcome as well. I must trust in that. Thank you so much for sharing your heart!

  4. Mark you spoke to me with this as well! It seems there are many of us who deal with the same insecurities and often live behind masks so nobody can see. One of my desires is to lose that mask! Working on it! 🙂

      1. Indeed we can! None of us is ever alone–it just feels that way sometimes when we tell ourselves we are alone. Praise God that he is with us always and at times we can even see him in the body of one of his “earth angels” who show up on our journeys for a short time or a long time.

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