Grief, Life, memoir, Writing

Big Boys Don’t Cry, Remember?

The myth continues… that boys don’t cry.

Ummm… I call BULL$#!+

Scene from the 1989 movie ‘The Abyss’

This scene caught my attention the other night while watching The Abyss with my family.

Why do we continue to perpetuate this belief? We see it in so many things in our society and especially in entertainment.

While the statement may be well intended… what harm does it cause?

I have spent a lifetime trying to live up to this lie. You can read my story in my memoir “Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry” available on Amazon and other online retailers.

And yes the title is a play on words and the lie.

What are your thoughts about this?

Grief, Life, Stories

Things happen…

𝐓𝐑𝐒𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐑𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧…

π‘„π‘’π‘’π‘ π‘‘π‘–π‘œπ‘› 𝑖𝑠 π‘€β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ π‘”π‘œπ‘–π‘›π‘” π‘‘π‘œ π‘‘π‘œ π‘Žπ‘π‘œπ‘’π‘‘ 𝑖𝑑? πŸ€”

From flat tires, to roof leaks, the horse favoring one leg, clients saying no, friends turning away, health issues, and even death.

𝐓𝐑𝐒𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐑𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧…

π»π‘œπ‘€ π‘‘π‘œ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘π‘™π‘’ 𝑖𝑑 π‘€β„Žπ‘’π‘› π‘‘β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘”π‘  β„Žπ‘Žπ‘π‘π‘’π‘›? πŸ€”

I am conducting market research gathering information from people like you about grief, loss, and healing. This data will help me to create the best resources for those who are hurting and struggling.

If you’re willing to answer a few questions send me a DM and we’ll setup a time to chat.

This is not a trick to get you on a sales call. Promise!

*π˜½π™€π™£π™ͺ𝙨 π™‹π™€π™žπ™£π™©π™¨ 𝙛𝙀𝙧 π™–π™£π™¨π™¬π™šπ™§π™žπ™£π™œ π™©π™π™žπ™¨ 𝙦π™ͺπ™šπ™¨π™©π™žπ™€π™£: πŸ€”

π‘π‘Žπ‘šπ‘’ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘šπ‘œπ‘£π‘–π‘’, π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘¦π‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿ 𝑖𝑑 π‘π‘Žπ‘šπ‘’ π‘œπ‘’π‘‘, π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘Žπ‘π‘‘π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘  𝑖𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘£π‘–π‘‘π‘’π‘œ.

Share your answers in the comments. πŸ‘Š

Grief, Life, memoir, Stories

Can You Do Me A Favor?

I need help in answering a few questions for market research related to grief and healing.

What grief are you still carrying?

I’m going all in on a new business coaching, mentoring, and helping men who are struggling with grief and healing from a traumatic experience and loss. Whether that be from the death of a loved one, relationships ending, financial hardship or job loss, the loss of a pet, and even the loss of a dream. Grief in it’s many forms impacts us all.

My memoir Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry was published last year which chronicles my own journey through loss, grief, and healing. I have my first hand experience walking through my own valley of the shadow to a life after and to make sure I have the greatest impact, and help the most men with the right solutions – I’m asking for your help in doing some market research.

Men needed, is this you? 

My goal is to interview 50 people, – yes, you read that correctly- so that I can get the best and most comprehensive insight as to what is needed in the area of navigating grief and healing for men from trauma.

The interview would only take between 15-30 minutes, and I promise, this is NOT a trick into asking people to be my clients, this is literally just market research so I make sure my programs and offerings are exactly what is needed.

Would you mind doing an interview with me? To make it super easy, just send me an email to mark@markschutter.com, let me know you are in and we’ll schedule a call.

Like I said, my goal is to interview 50 people so any help you can offer would be greatly appreciated.

My ideal client

Describes themselves as male who has experienced a significant loss regardless of when it happened and struggles with moving forward, healing, and finding purpose in their life after. They ultimately want joy, contentment and purpose for their lives but haven’t been able to get there on their own yet.

And I have an ask of the women too!

I’m hoping you might know 1-3 men who fit the description above. And if so, would you be willing to introduce them to me?

If yes for this, then please email me at mark@markschutter.com, CC’ing whoever you have in mind and I’ll follow up with them with some additional information and how to book a call.

Like I said, my goal is to interview 50 men and a few women, so any help you can offer would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

And you can purchase Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry at any of the following >

And a review on Amazon or Goodreads would be very much appreciated.  Thanks again! 

Grief, Life, memoir

A Small Favor? I need your help, please!

What grief are you still carrying?

I’m super excited to announce that I’m going all in on a new business coaching, mentoring, and helping men who are struggling with grief and healing from a traumatic experience and loss. Whether that be from the death of a loved one, relationships ending, financial hardship or job loss, the loss of a pet, and even the loss of a dream. Grief impacts us all.

My memoir Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry was published last year which chronicles my own journey through loss, grief, and healing. I have my first hand experience walking through my own valley of the shadow to a life after and to make sure I have the greatest impact, and help the most men with the right solutions – I’m asking for your help in doing some market research.


It is time to engage in more conversations around ‘life after…’ and what that might look like to help others move forward who have experienced trauma, loss, and grief. 

Isn’t that all of us? 

My goal is to interview 50 people, – yes, you read that correctly- so that I can get the best and most comprehensive insight as to what is needed in the area of navigating grief and healing for men from trauma.

My ideal interviewee describes themselves as male who has experienced a significant loss regardless of when it happened and struggles with moving forward, healing, and finding purpose in their life after. They ultimately want joy, contentment and purpose for their lives but haven’t been able to get there on their own yet.

The interview would only take between 15-30 minutes, and I promise, this is NOT a trick into asking people to be my clients, this is literally just market research so I make sure my programs and offerings are exactly what is needed.

Men needed, is this you? 

If this is you, would you mind doing an interview with me? To make it super easy, just hit send me an email to mark@markschutter.com, let me know you are in and we’ll schedule a call.

Like I said, my goal is to interview 50 people so any help you can offer would be greatly appreciated.

And a few women!

I am also hoping to interview a few women who have experienced loss, grief, and trauma regarding their own journey. This would enable me to, showcase the difference in support systems that may be available and to highlight similarities and differences regarding the different expectations and coping between men and women who are grieving. 

Would you be interested?

If this isn’t you, maybe you can still help.

I’m hoping you might know 1-3 men who fit the description above. And if so, would you be willing to introduce them to me?

If yes for this, then please email me at mark@markschutter.com, CC’ing whoever you have in mind and I’ll follow up with them with some additional information and how to book a call.

Like I said, my goal is to interview 50 men and a few women, so any help you can offer would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Get your copy of Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry here >

And a review on Amazon or Goodreads would be very much appreciated.  Thanks again! πŸ‘Š

Grief, Life, Writing

Pain – It’s Not a Competition

It is not a competition, although some will try to make it into one.

“Yeah, but let me tell you what happened to me…”

We all have stories to tell and they should be told. There is often healing in our sharing and it may give others hope. There is resilience and a vulnerable courage in sharing our pain and also our triumphs.

There can be “life after” if we choose it and others stories may help us get there. But sometimes, preaching to myself here, we need to shut up and just listen. Or sit in silence with someone in their pain.

There is more than enough these days to go around.

(Read Job 2:13)

Life, Poetry, Writing

FREEFALLING – Who is there to catch you?

In the middle of the night, in the silence, in the darkness the voices in my head often scream the loudest causing my thoughts to freefall, piercing my heart. ❀

Do you have someone who you can trust to always catch you when you are freefalling?

My God is always there to catch me of that I do not doubt. Yet, sometimes I need someone with skin on. πŸ˜‰

For me, this is my beautiful wife. My warrior queen who has stood by my side for over 25 years. Day in and day out she battles the enemies of our hearts, souls and minds. Enemies from within and from without.

I am blessed!

She reminds me what love, courage and grace were always meant to be.

Who will catch you when you are freefalling?

Life, Photograph, Poetry, Writing

The Haunting Of…

Stare into my eyes
And what do you see
Beyond mere physical
The redness and fatigue
Past a tiredness and regret
The HAUNTING of
Whatever this way may come
In uncertainty and chaos
For in times of trouble
Steady on my friends
Hope is still alive

Sometimes we just don’t know, and sometimes we have to move and get off the X.

You have the power to help, power to make the world a little better one ripple at a time. The future is uncertain and our souls need rest. Our hearts are haunted, it is a time of troubles and yet, we must believe that hope is still alive.

Challenge: During this time of uncertainty in which we find ourselves what one thing can you do?

#JustBelieve #HopeLives #LoveChangesPeople #WarriorsNeeded

Life, Writing

A Rare and Curious Phenomenon?

In the midst of the times in which we currently find ourselves, I find this quote from Thomas Wolfe all the more appropriate. As we isolate, self-quarantine and social distance from one another the sense of loneliness can inevitably grow. Leading to heightened anxiety and stress levels, lowering our immune systems even more.

So how do we combat this while maintaining our boundaries to curtail the spread of infection? How do we maintain connection with others? A few tips:

  • Use technology wisely – text messaging, video chats and even the age old phone call. However, be cautious as to what you consume through social media as this can be overwhelming and add to the anxiety.
  • Eat healthy and stay hydrated – cut out as much junk food as you can and avoid large amounts of alcohol.
  • Get moving – even with all the requests and directives to not venture out or shelter in place you can still exercise. Either at home or by going for a walk, jog or bike ride. The fresh air and sunshine can have a good effect on your mood.
  • Take up a hobby virtually – something you have always wanted to learn. There are a plethora of options for on-line learning available to us. Note: see first bullet.
  • Keep your pets close – the unconditional love they give is the best.
  • Keep the faith!

This affects us all and we are all in this together.

#JustBelieve #HopeLives #LoveChangesPeople