Grief, Life, memoir

When You Ask A Man How He Is.

“I’m alright.”

A man says “I’m alright” when asked how he is because nobody cares?

I tend to disagree with the last line in the audio of the video that a man simply responds “I’m alright” because no one f&%king cares. I think others, men and women, do care.

The problem is we don’t always know how to care or show that we care. We don’t know what to do or say, especially men. We get uncomfortable with the feelings and vulnerability that this question invokes. Life is a struggle at times and no one is immune. Why can’t we acknowledge the struggle and the pain that we may be feeling?

Are you uncomfortable sharing your true feelings and if so why?

I think we have been programmed, again especially as men, to ignore our feelings of sadness, pain, regret and grief. And women are programmed to expect men to respond this way. Remember boys, and men, are supposed to be tough and strong. But why do we stereotype a man who is hurting and feeling as not being strong and tough?

What strength does it take to confront our pain and heal from it?

I talk a lot about expectations, real and perceived, that I accepted from society, family, friends when I was grieving. The impacts it has had on me and the struggles in my book – ๐˜พ๐™ค๐™ฌ๐™—๐™ค๐™ฎ๐™จ ๐˜ผ๐™ง๐™š ๐™‰๐™ค๐™ฉ ๐™Ž๐™ช๐™ฅ๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™จ๐™š๐™™ ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐˜พ๐™ง๐™ฎ.

Available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and iTunes.

When you ask a man how he is and he says “I’m alright.” #CowboysAreNotSupposedtoCry #MentalHealth #Men #Healing #LifeAfter #Trauma #Pain #Loss #Grief

What emotions and feelings are you hiding from others?

Adventure, Life, Writing

2022 Is Here, Are You Lost Yet?

The calendar has turned over to 2022, whether we welcome in the new year or not it is now here. It is indifferent to our feelings, our wants, our desires, and our needs. Time marches on as the hands on the clocks tick endlessly on until the batteries run down and the motor stops.

Is this a metaphor for our lives? Our lives move on, whether we do or not, until our batteries run down until we are faced with our own deaths and our life’s ending.

With everything going on in our world today, we can often feel lost. Maybe we need to intentionally get lost? Turn off the electronics and away from the incessant noise of social media and the news.

3 Tips – Get, Go, and Grab!

  • Get outside into nature, put on a coat and hat if its cold, and turn off the notifications on your phone. Trust me you’ll be okay. ๐Ÿ˜‰
  • Go somewhere you’ve never been before and really look at what is in front of you. Especially if you don’t know where you are. ๐Ÿ˜Ž
  • Grab someone you love and hold them tight. Feel their breathing and listen for there heartbeat. That is what’s important. ๐Ÿ˜š

Here’s to a great tomorrow!

Grief, memoir, Stories

Revisiting Chapter 2 – A Far Better Place

Alone into the Alone

A far better placeโ€”the phrase echoes through my mind, and my faith tells me to believe in this. As a Christian don’t the words of our God tell us there is a far better place?


Yet I ask, what does that mean, and how do we know? We don’t know I often want to scream back. Instead, I and nod in a feinted attempt at agreement, holding onto hope, that there is a far better place.

An interesting chapter and maybe the most philosophical of the entire book, as I ask the questions that many have asked before me. The theological questions of life after death, what happens to us, is there a heaven and if so isn’t there a hell? Even atheists and agnostics with no faith in a god or a higher power have asked the question, wondering what is there after we die?

The last paragraph of chapter 1 of my memoir Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry speaks of Luka’s belief in a far better place. (You can read my thoughts and revisit of chapter 1 here.)

Luka was the one facing her own mortality, not me. She was the one who must venture alone into the alone, not me. I wonder even now what thoughts ran through her mind that she did not share with me. Or worse still those thoughts she did share and I have long forgotten. Her words tossed aside as if they were of no more importance than a scrap of garbage. What are you supposed to do with that?

Believe… in life after otherwise what’s the point?

Available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and iTunes
Life, memoir, Writing

Are you receiving my NEWSLETTER?

I have sent out my most recent newsletter just today and it can be viewed here.

It is a great way to keep up to date and be one of the first to hear about exciting events and happenings. My memoir is now available in both print and e-book formats.

Purchase your copy here:

Amazon > https://www.amzn.com/1639031022

Barnes and Noble > https://www.bn.com/s/9781639031023

I have some exciting changes coming up and new opportunities that I will be sharing. So, let’s start the conversation about

“Life after…”

memoir, Writing

There is and can be ‘life after…”

Print and e-book available now on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

Here is the video trailer >

What do you think of when you hear the word grief?

How would you describe the experience, your experience?

๐—–๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜†๐˜€ ๐—”๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ก๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฆ๐˜‚๐—ฝ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—–๐—ฟ๐˜† > Available now on Amazon > https://www.amzn.com/1639031022ย #Grief #Memoir #Healing #Men

God, Grief, Life, Writing

Do you feel alone? Maybe, you are not as alone as you think.

But Jesus Himself would often slip away to the wilderness and pray. ~Luke 5:15 NASB

Do not fear, for I am with you; I will bring your offspring from the east, And gather you from the west. ~Isaiah 43:5 NASB

These things I have spoken to you to that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world. ~John 16:33 NASB

There are a lot of troubling things going on all over the world right now. Whether you agree or disagree with decisions being made, I think we can all agree that the current state of affairs is troubling. As we watch events unfold we cannot help but think and worry about the impacts on your personal world. Our families and friends, our workplaces and places we visit all are feeling the effects.

I am in the midst of many changes in my personal life and the decisions often seem overwhelming. However, I trust the one who has the answers even when he doesn’t reveal them to me. I talk a lot about this in my memoir ๐‚๐จ๐ฐ๐›๐จ๐ฒ๐ฌ ๐€๐ซ๐ž ๐๐จ๐ญ ๐’๐ฎ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐จ๐ฌ๐ž๐ ๐ญ๐จ ๐‚๐ซ๐ฒ which was just published by Christian Faith Publishing and is available on Amazon.

I have to remind myself that I am not truly alone and there are others struggling with decisions and impacts as well. I think we have a couple of options:

  1. Trust God. This is where our faith determines our outlook and do we believe that God is still in control despite what we see happening all around us.
  2. Reach out in service of others. Those around us who are experiencing similar things, let us help one another grow as individuals and communities.
  3. Shrink back. This should not be an option as this only serves to isolate us more and allows fear, distrust, and distress to grow. (โฌ…PS – this is exactly what the enemy wants us to do.

Now, what will you choose?

Do not rejoiceย over me, enemyย of mine.
Thoughย I fallย I will rise;
Thoughย I liveย in darkness, the LORDย is a lightย for me.
~Micah 7:8

Life, memoir, Photograph

Coming changes, can you see them?

A line from the movie Stagecoach.

There are changes coming my friends. Perhaps some for the better and some for the worse. Who knows?

I cannot see that far in the future to know what may come. There is one who does because he is already there and that is where I choose to place my trust.

These changes will irrevocably change us as we move forward.

Because as the Ringo Kid (John Wayne) said in Stagecoach, there are some things you just can’t run away from. ๐Ÿ‘Š

Available now on Amazon – https://www.amzn.com/1639031022
Grief, Photograph, Writing

The Waiting is the Hardest Part!

๐—–๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜†๐˜€ ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ ๐—ฐ๐—ฟ๐˜†๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐˜† ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ป’๐˜ ๐—บ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ถ๐—ณ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ ๐—ฝ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐˜†๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด! ๐Ÿ“ท Carri Schutter

๐—–๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜†๐˜€ ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—ป๐—ผ๐˜ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ ๐—ฐ๐—ฟ๐˜†๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฏ๐˜‚๐˜ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐˜† ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ป’๐˜ ๐—บ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ถ๐—ณ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—บ ๐—ฝ๐—ฟ๐—ฎ๐˜†๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด!

Sometimes you just need to slow down and breathe in the moment. It has been a crazy couple of weeks and with everything going on around the publication of my memoir. The other evening I was blessed to go out to the barn with my wife and daughter. It was a quiet evening just the three of us and the horses, those are the times and the memories I cherish.

What about you?

As we approach the upcoming release of my memoir > ๐˜พ๐™ค๐™ฌ๐™—๐™ค๐™ฎ๐™จ ๐˜ผ๐™ง๐™š ๐™‰๐™ค๐™ฉ ๐™Ž๐™ช๐™ฅ๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™จ๐™š๐™™ ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐˜พ๐™ง๐™ฎ as a precursor I encourage you to take a listen to the conversation with Ronit Plank as a guest on her podcast ๐—”๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ง๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—˜๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜†๐˜๐—ต๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—–๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ฒ๐—ฑ last January talking about life, death, grief and healing.

Click on the graphic to go to the podcast episode.

God, Life, Writing

Are You Living in Fear? > Do Not Fear!

Do not allow a spirit of fear to run your life for you are more than a  conquer in Jesus! ๐Ÿ‘Š

Rise up mighty warriors! โš”

Yeshua tells us in this world we will have trouble but he has overcome the world. Better yet he is coming back with all of heavens army.

Are you ready to fight with him?