A moment of vulnerability my friends. I try really hard to be positive in my outlook on life. But every once in a while, yes every once in a while I fall and slip down into my own darkness. Lately, I have struggled with feelings of inadequacy and uncertainty. Hence, the poem above.
This life on this side of the undiscovered, is not always easy. Things are thrown at us and we are left to deal with it. And sometimes we deal, or cope, better than others. We fall and struggle to get back up. It is then that we must persevere.
We must extend grace to ourselves as we hopefully would to others when they fall. We are all in this together, right? I encourage you, as I will do, to just believe that grace wins and hope lives. Even and especially in those dark and troubled times of life.
How often do we hide, camouflaged if you will, from others and even ourselves?
The false image we present to the world will eventually become our reality and then colors everything we know and are. This is not truth, but a lie. I do not want to live this way.
Openness is difficult, transparency is rife with trapdoors and there is fear in vulnerability and is so often ridiculed by others. Our hearts must be protected yes, but also true freedom is only found in healing the broken places we all carry deep inside.
How do you see yourself, how do you believe others see you? What is your truth? Will you drop the camouflage and emerge into the open or will you continue to hide?
As we enter the second week of 2015, I have found myself hiding. Hiding from the world, from family, from friends and even from myself. One of my last posts from 2014 was a poem and video about being tired of wearing masks, hiding my true self from others. I want freedom and even intimate transparency, even though it scares me so much.
My desires have waned over the years and now it feels like it is time to step out from hiding. I still have no idea where I am going in 2015 or what I will be doing. In other words I have no goals or resolutions at least not yet. 🙂 More to come on that I am sure.
There are forces at work in my life and I feel myself being lead back but to what, I do not know. So here is the first post of the new year so buckle up and enjoy the ride! For who knows where the road may take us and the adventure that awaits! ~M
Poetry, music, creative writing and a desire to inspire.....Isaiah 41:10: So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.