Grief, Life, memoir, Writing

Revisiting Chapter 14 – As the World Moves On

This is the last chapter in Part 2, Embracing the Present of my memoir, ๐‚๐จ๐ฐ๐›๐จ๐ฒ๐ฌ ๐€๐ซ๐ž ๐๐จ๐ญ ๐’๐ฎ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐จ๐ฌ๐ž๐ ๐ญ๐จ ๐‚๐ซ๐ฒ and seems fitting as truly the world moves on after your loss and you have to somehow figure out and accept the reality. This means embracing the present in order to move on with it.

“Just as sure as the turnin’ of the earth.” – Ethan Edwards (John Wayne), The Searchers #quote #western #movie

The Searchers

One of my favorite movies, and allegory for my own life as I have spend so much time searching for answers to questions that haunt me. Questions of which most have no answers this side of the undiscovered (heaven).

I have learned that for my healing it has meant reconciling my past, embracing the present, and redeeming my future. Often in no particular order as grief is not linear and there are so many ‘secondary’ losses that pop up. Even years later sometimes, that I must wrestle with and heal from.

โฉ Grief is carried as we search for what it means to us.

There seemed to be a turning point for me in September of 2017 after returning from a family vacation to Yellowstone National park when I wrote a blog post entitled “Searching… it’s all shit!”

I was finally realizing that I needed to get help and healing for my past, my present, and my future, and to be the best version of myself for those I loved and loved me in return. It was around this time that I seriously began the collating and putting together my memoir. Two years later in August of 2019, I signed a publishing contract with Christian Faith Publishing and my book was published the following August of 2020.

It was during this time that I realized that to truly rebuild my life after the pain and sorrow, I would have to let go of death, but would always carry the experience.

The joys and sorrows would forever occupy the same space in my heart.

I must reconcile my past, embrace my present, and redeem my future. To move forward, not on, to discover where it is that I came from, knowing that death will always follow me. We unwillingly say a courageous faithful amen to the way it was, it is, and can be; which is what acknowledging death asks of us.

Get your copy of Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry here >

And a review on Amazon or Goodreads would be very much appreciated.  Thanks again! 

> If you are struggling with moving forward following a loss and searching for your best โ€œlife afterโ€, reach out. Leave a comment or email me at,

Iโ€™ll follow up with some additional information and how to book a free call to chat and see if I can help. Thanks!

I am Mark W. Schutter, Grief Coach for Men and Author of the memoir ๐‚๐จ๐ฐ๐›๐จ๐ฒ๐ฌ ๐€๐ซ๐ž ๐๐จ๐ญ ๐’๐ฎ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐จ๐ฌ๐ž๐ ๐ญ๐จ ๐‚๐ซ๐ฒ, and we all need a little support sometimes.

Read my thoughts on previous chapters of my memoir, links below.

Part 1 โ€“ Reconciling the Past

Part 2 โ€“ Embracing the Present

Grief, Life, memoir, Writing

Big Boys Don’t Cry, Remember?

The myth continues… that boys don’t cry.

Ummm… I call BULL$#!+

Scene from the 1989 movie ‘The Abyss’

This scene caught my attention the other night while watching The Abyss with my family.

Why do we continue to perpetuate this belief? We see it in so many things in our society and especially in entertainment.

While the statement may be well intended… what harm does it cause?

I have spent a lifetime trying to live up to this lie. You can read my story in my memoir “Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry” available on Amazon and other online retailers.

And yes the title is a play on words and the lie.

What are your thoughts about this?

Life, memoir, Photograph

Coming changes, can you see them?

A line from the movie Stagecoach.

There are changes coming my friends. Perhaps some for the better and some for the worse. Who knows?

I cannot see that far in the future to know what may come. There is one who does because he is already there and that is where I choose to place my trust.

These changes will irrevocably change us as we move forward.

Because as the Ringo Kid (John Wayne) said in Stagecoach, there are some things you just can’t run away from. ๐Ÿ‘Š

Available now on Amazon –