Grief, Life, memoir, Writing

Revisiting Chapter 3 – Walking Away

Sometimes you have to walk away…

Chapter 3 began taking shape in my mind following a conversation with my therapist. As usual we were discussing Luka’s death and the impacts on me, when I mentioned that in the moments after she died. I spoke about remembering standing by her bedside where she lay. Thinking to myself, there was nothing else I could do. I had to and needed to walk away. Yet, I stayed for several moments by her bedside.

I knew I needed to walk away. To turn from this lifeless body that lay in front of me that had held my whole world. There was nothing left for me to do for her.

I recall my therapist staring at me in silence for several seconds before he spoke softly. “It’s interesting in all my experience you are the first person to talk about that. I mean we talk about the death and then we jump to the funeral proceedings and all the logistical things around death. No one has ever mentioned before, those moments immediately following someone dying and what those left behind have to do.”

I swallowed hard and responded, “Yeah, her death was peaceful and calm but then what? I stood there, knowing she was dead and then realizing that was it. I had to turn away from everything I knew and walk away, leaving her there alone. That was hard.”

I don’t recall if I thought about all those things that would never be again or just the among of willpower it took to move my feet and leave her behind. Our time together in the physical world was done.

“Time together was the only thing, just being with her, sitting talking, watching movies, and holding her hand, so many things that I now believe may have helped her breathe a little easier in those moments.”

CHAPTER 3, WALKING AWAY, PAGE 40 – MARK W. SCHUTTER

There would be no more talks, no more movies, no more time together. Only the memories of what once was. I still carry those memories, nothing can take them away, although the edges of my memory may have frayed and faded a bit. That is just time eroding what once was. I was heading towards my 29th birthday…

“I was lost at sea with on wind in my sails. I had the freedom to do, to be, to go anywhere I wanted, and I did not want that freedom. I was free to walk away. How do you reconcile that?”

CHAPTER 3. WALKING AWAY, PAGE 42 – MARK W. SCHUTTER

Here are links to my thoughts and revisits of Chapter 1 and Chapter 2.

Order your copy today, and one or two or threeโ€ฆ as a gift for some else who is struggling, 

You can also contact me here on my website to purchase signed copies.

PAY IT FORWARD!

Grief, Life, memoir, Stories, Writing

Pay it Forward – Will You Purpose to Commit Intentional Acts of Kindness?

Signed copies of my memoir being packaged for delivery!

There is still time to order your own copy and one or two or three… as a gift for some else in time for the holidays. PAY IT FORWARD! ๐Ÿ‘Š Available in print and e-book.

You can also reach out to me here on my website to purchase signed copies. Here’s some comments I have received from readers –

  • Your story touched my heart in more ways than I can even explain. Even though it triggered a lot of sadness and emotions it also gave me hope.
  • Just finished the first chapter of your book and I must tell you how beautiful your words are. You have such an amazing gift. Thank you for sharingโค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ
  • I will have to say I have never read a book like yours before. I read a lot! I do want to tell you that this book is absolutely amazing. Thank you for sharing your feelings.

There is always hope of ‘life after…” and hope is never a small thing. #CowboysAreNotsupposedtoCry #Memoir #Grief #Healing #Trauma #LifeAfter https://www.amzn.com/1639031022 

Grief, Life, memoir, Writing

Are You Shopping On – Cyber Monday 2021?

Get a jump on Cyber Monday and here’s an idea, my memoir! >

AmazonBarnes and Noble iTunes

A great little gift for yourself or someone you love. A story of love, loss, and carrying grief midst the expectations of men who are struggling to heal from trauma. A story for men who have suffered pain and the women who love them.

Reviews:

“Like John Maxwell, OG Mandino, Simon Sinek, Brene Brown etc. and your book is absolutely right up there with those authors. The questions, they style, the literary techniques and your heart and soul you poured into it – I truly didn’t want to put it down and looked forward to reading more.” ~Caleb K.

“This will help so many people out there who are struggling with grief and it’s inevitable storm cloud of trauma. This book reveals that some things stay with you forever, eternally scarred, and that’s okay. Sometimes you need to cry, and be able to express the rawness of grief, and that’s okay.” ~Charis S.

“Such a beautiful, inspiring narrative of love, grief, strength and vulnerability . I highly recommend this book. A must read for those who have lost a loved one or who just need to be reminded that there is great love and hope in this world.” ~Nicole M.

“This is a great book for anyone who is experiencing grief. Markโ€™s story is one of love, sadness and pain but also of hope and is inspiring to someone currently experiencing similar pain and stuck in grief of the death of someone we loved so dearly.” ~Kristi W.

“It isn’t a self help book, telling you how to feel, what to think and how to act. It isn’t going to tell you how to fix yourself or how to move on with life.ย This is a beautiful memoir of just that, gut wrenching reality and the beauty behind true grief. Mark shares his story, without hiding the truth, the ugly side of grief.” ~Carri S.

“This book goes where few are willing. The author shares deeply painful and personal experiences and memories. It celebrates the power of unconditional love and brings to light the brutality of death. It is a must read for all who have loved and lost as well as a beautiful reminder that there is always hope.” ~Teresa S.

“This book is so wonderfully written. When you read this book you can almost feel the emotions of the author. I hope anyone who has lost a love one will consider reading this book .” ~Bobbie L.

Order your copy now and one as a gift for someone who is hurting!

Life, memoir

I’ve Got 2 Days to Find This, Help!

Yes, it’s the week of Thanksgiving in the US. As we scramble for things needed for Thursday’s meal I have been unable to locate this at any of the stores. It is highly needed to make our turkey dinner the best it can be. ๐Ÿฆƒ It’s ‘flavor fresh!’

Anyone know where I can purchase this item? ๐Ÿค”Thanks in advance!

And don’t forget my memoir ๐˜พ๐™ค๐™ฌ๐™—๐™ค๐™ฎ๐™จ ๐˜ผ๐™ง๐™š ๐™‰๐™ค๐™ฉ ๐™Ž๐™ช๐™ฅ๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™จ๐™š๐™™ ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐˜พ๐™ง๐™ฎ is available on Amazon as well as other online retailers!

If you are hurting or know some one who is this would make a great present I reckon. Just saying!๐Ÿ‘Š

There is ‘life after…’

Life, memoir, Writing

Are you receiving my NEWSLETTER?

I have sent out my most recent newsletter just today and it can be viewed here.

It is a great way to keep up to date and be one of the first to hear about exciting events and happenings. My memoir is now available in both print and e-book formats.

Purchase your copy here:

Amazon > https://www.amzn.com/1639031022

Barnes and Noble > https://www.bn.com/s/9781639031023

I have some exciting changes coming up and new opportunities that I will be sharing. So, let’s start the conversation about

“Life after…”

memoir, Writing

There is and can be ‘life after…”

Print and e-book available now on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

Here is the video trailer >

What do you think of when you hear the word grief?

How would you describe the experience, your experience?

๐—–๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜†๐˜€ ๐—”๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ก๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฆ๐˜‚๐—ฝ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—–๐—ฟ๐˜† > Available now on Amazon > https://www.amzn.com/1639031022ย #Grief #Memoir #Healing #Men

Grief, memoir, Stories

Cowboys … Cry?

Vulnerable transparency post!

My just released memoir is titled:

Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry

So why is that the past few days I have been on the edge of tears?

There is so much going on in my life right now both personally and professionally, more to come on that later.

Not to mention the chaotic and confusing world we find ourselves living in right now. But like the Ringo Kid (John Wayne) said in Stagecoach

“Well, there are some things a man just can’t run away from. “

My friends I am not running but I am being wise as every warrior must be if they are to survive and thrive. May God bless you. Stay strong and remember sometimes even the strongest cowboys cry.

The print copy of my book (memoir) is available now on Amazon.
Grief, Life, memoir

“I am speechless!” – Book Update

๐“๐ก๐š๐ง๐ค ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ! To each one who has purchased my #memoir,

๐˜พ๐™ค๐™ฌ๐™—๐™ค๐™ฎ๐™จ ๐˜ผ๐™ง๐™š ๐™‰๐™ค๐™ฉ ๐™Ž๐™ช๐™ฅ๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™จ๐™š๐™™ ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐˜พ๐™ง๐™ฎ

I have received some amazing private messages from readers describing how much my book has impacted them.

  • “This book is absolutely amazing. Just the emotion I felt while reading it was so crazy.”
  • “Pacing myself, fighting feelings of not wanting it to end.”
  • “I really donโ€™t know what to say . I guess Iโ€™m pretty speechless.”

These are just a few! ๐Ÿ˜‰ I am truly blessed!!! If you have or intend to read my book I would truly appreciate you leaving a review on Amazon and Goodreads. Thank you so much!

You can purchase a print copy now and the E-book is coming soon!

God bless!

Grief, Writing

My Memoir is Available for Pre-sale!!!

Although not officially released my memoir ๐—–๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐˜†๐˜€ ๐—”๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐—ก๐—ผ๐˜ ๐—ฆ๐˜‚๐—ฝ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—–๐—ฟ๐˜† is now available to purchase through pre-sale on Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com – go order a copy today!

My publisher Christian Faith Publishing is currently converting the book to the various E-book formats to upload soon. They are also creating a video trailer for the book and a press release to go out to thousands of media outlets including bloggers, journalists, newspapers, television and radio stations, websites and book reviewers. When the press release goes out that will be the “official release” for the book, but why wait?

Go order your copy today! It is a story of love, hope, and healing.

Again, you can now purchase the book online at Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com.

Soon I will be offering autographed copies through my website here, along with some other promotional events and giveaways to compliment the book. Stay tuned for that!

How can you support me and help promote the book?

  1. Buy the book (hardcopy and e-book), read the book and share on social media, post a review on Amazon, Goodreads etc.
  2. Buy the book (hardcopy and e-book), read the book and share on social media.
  3. Buy the book (hardcopy and e-book).

P.S. – I am planning an audio version of the book to be available soon also!

Thank you all so much for your support and encouragement! 

Go live your dreams because there is life after…

~Mark (Exodus 15:3)

God, Grief, Life, Writing

Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry – A Memoir

๐‘จ๐’๐’… ๐’•๐’‰๐’† ๐‘ฉ๐’†๐’”๐’• ๐‘ป๐’‰๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐’€๐’๐’– ๐‘ช๐’‚๐’ ๐‘ซ๐’ ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰ ๐‘ซ๐’†๐’‚๐’•๐’‰ ๐‘ฐ๐’” ๐’•๐’ ๐‘น๐’Š๐’…๐’† ๐’๐’‡๐’‡ ๐’‡๐’“๐’๐’Ž ๐’Š๐’•?

So excited, I received the first physical copies of my memoir and upcoming book today! ๐Ÿ‘Š

Shows me, the author, holding the first physical copy of my upcoming memoir - Cowboys Are Not Supposed to Cry
First physical copy of my upcoming book! (8/11/2021)

Thank you Jesus, and my family, and friends for all the love and support, and my publisher Christian Faith Publishing. The story of my journey carrying grief and healing will be soon be available. I pray it blesses and helps others dealing with the pain of loss.

๐‘จ๐’๐’… ๐’•๐’‰๐’† ๐‘ฉ๐’†๐’”๐’• ๐‘ป๐’‰๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐’€๐’๐’– ๐‘ช๐’‚๐’ ๐‘ซ๐’ ๐’˜๐’Š๐’•๐’‰ ๐‘ซ๐’†๐’‚๐’•๐’‰ ๐‘ฐ๐’” ๐’•๐’ ๐‘น๐’Š๐’…๐’† ๐’๐’‡๐’‡ ๐’‡๐’“๐’๐’Ž ๐’Š๐’•? #CowboysAreNotSupposedtoCry #Memoir #UpcomingBook #WritersLife #WickedQuestions

#LiveYourDreams – Exodus 15:3

Watch for a soon to be announced release date and opportunities to be part of the launch team!! This is how my story begins.

“๐€๐ฌ ๐ˆ ๐ฅ๐จ๐จ๐ค ๐›๐š๐œ๐ค ๐จ๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ ๐ฆ๐ฒ ๐ฅ๐ข๐Ÿ๐ž,โ€ฆ”